Since today is our 8 year anniversary, I thought I’d share a little story from our own wedding that we can now share quite humorously, and often do with our couples, because well…now its funny, but it wasn’t quite so funny at the time. In fact, I have a picture below to prove it wasn’t very funny at the time because it’s written all over my bridesmaids’ faces.
“Don’t let tradition or what you think you should do dictate what you do on your wedding day.”
On to the, now, humorous story that will, hopefully, illustrate my point. 8 years ago today Chris and I got married. There was a wedding. There was dancing. There was cake. There were friends. There was a grand exit. There was trying to get me to the altar. See exhibit A below. Please note the looks on my bridesmaids’ faces, the vice grip my maid of honor has on my arm, the flower girl chewing on her fingernail, and my poor mother who had just written very large checks to make said wedding day happen.
Would ya look at that? I am the very picture of a blushing bride.
Here’s what’s happening in this photo. I have this thing where I have a hard time processing the reality of situations until the worst possible moment. For instance, about 5 minutes before I was supposed to walk down the aisle, and right around the time this photo was taken, I heard wedding music coming from the ceremony site and it hit me like a ton of bricks. And because I have awesome timing, I chose that particular moment to be overcome with the reality and the gravity of the commitment Chris and I were about to make to each other. It freaked me out! Here is the part where I tell you what this has to do with tradition and how we could have avoided the minor freakout and enjoyed our day more fully.
Tradition says that a bride and a groom aren’t supposed to see each other until the bride walks down the aisle. So, Chris and I didn’t see each other until 5 PM. That means that we spent most of our entire wedding day making decisions and trying to pull off a large event completely separate from each other. (We also didn’t hire a wedding planner which is a regret for another post.) I don’t know about you, but I need my person when I’m stressed. Chris is my person. He calms me down and keeps me sane, and that day I could’ve used some sanity. Our photographer, Brett, has wedding ESP. She can sense things a mile off, and she tried so hard even on the wedding day to get me to see Chris, but I didn’t listen. Sorry, Brett. You were right…
“Talk about what you two need as a couple, and don’t let tradition dictate what you do purely for the sake of tradition.”
So, here’s what we recommend to all brides and grooms. Talk about what you two need as a couple, and don’t let tradition dictate what you do purely for the sake of tradition. Tradition can totally rock if that’s what you love! But, we’re here to tell you it’s your wedding day, so do what you want. Know yourself, and be okay doing what’s going to help you enjoy the day the most.
-Written by Rachel